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October 24, 2023 / philosophermouseofthehedge

Bone Guards and Plump Kins

During the eclipse, odd shadows bubbled up. A warning or history? (© image copyrighted, all rights reserved, no permissions granted)

This could open with “It was a dark and stormy knight” but then everyone would be expecting a re-tale-ing of King Arthur or something armored in heavy mental metal. 

Not wandering that far a field of dreams: Only a reconnoissance report as Holler-Ring slinks closer.

Some insist these drapey hangings are nothing more than holiday yard decor, but  I dispute.

Halloween spider webs covering bushes (© image copyrighted, no permissions granted, all rights reserved.

Deceptive veggie trap! (© image)

Ah-ha! It’s deviously sticky and can tie you up.

I should know.

While walking Staff, I bravely stepped closer to inspect the strange, stringy, border defense system – resulting in Staff mumbling that some serious dog detangling would now be required – and she wasn’t talking about creme rinse.

It’s OK ..even if I didn’t realize the entanglement qualities of the stuff and kept turning around and around and around (obvious to anyone looking except Staff I was chasing tale.) ”Helping!” I was helping! 

Any way, after that whine-ing up encounter, it became obvious that the white fishy-net is a new strategy by homeowners to deter settlements of Orange Vegetable Invaders coming too close to their houses.

Seems to be working.

I can only hope that squirrels don’t get caught up in “helping”, too.

Inflatable Halloween Pumpkin in yard with spiderweb on bushes behind ( image copyright, all rights reserved, No permissions granted)

“Oh, dread. A Plump Kins outpost. Hmm, you know how they always say when infants smile, it’s just gas? Any chance that’s true with Plump Kins?” (© image)

Additional barriers may be needed as it appears the smaller Orange Vegetable Intruders roll in – establishing huddles in assorted formations around residents’ porches and front doors – only to be followed by their much larger Plump Kins.

Worrisome indeed considering the cost of groceries these day. Who wants a bunch of uninvited guests showing up – especially ones who look like they are use to consuming large amounts?

Staff said they are blow hards who live on air.

Even more worrisome with the recent bad air ozone alerts! (Wonder if they get air indigestion? In my opinion, the neighborhood doesn’t need giant Plump Kins with digestive problems…that’s not natural gas.)

One house around the corner has hired some mercenaries to guard their house. It’s a Bone Guard!

Halloween skeletons on display ( image copyrighted, all rights reserved, no permissions granted)

“Is this mercenary group big enough to be a deterrent to the Orange Vegetable Invaders? Wow it looks like Pizza Hut delivers. They look like they need to chow down a bit…or have they been fasting in preparation for the Orange Veggie arrivals?”  (© image)

An army of Halloween Skeletons in yard. (© image copyrighted , all rights reserved , no permissions granted)

Looks like their defense contract is for an extended time – they brought their unlive stock, too. No unicorns here. (© image)

Are they are extras from “Game of Thrones”? There are so many of them. Guess when the script ran out, they were hungry for more.

Hope the homeowner has stocked the fridge with lots of bone meals to keep their protection sticking around!

Not sure if that fence is to keep the defenders in or keep hungry attackers out.

The German Shepherd across the street there keeps barking he wants a sample. Sample? Of what? Fighting ability?

Thought he was supposed to be a bonafied police dog. Just boneheaded, it seems.

Halloween skeleton dogs on a leash. (© image copyrighted all rights reserved no permissions granted)

No bones to pick here. The Bone Guard has so much diversity: dog trainers, gymnasts…  (© image)

As the whorl turns, it’s time for me to trot along.

What? Oh, it does look like an ankle bone tucked in my side.

Uh, guess it got stuck to me by some remnant of that sticky defense net.

Sorry. Just let me bury that right by that loose toe – Just ribbing! HAHAHAHA! Oh, OK. I’ll drop that off, too.

Never Fear – even if Holler-Ring is near.

Hollywood Hank the Husky on duty here.

Hollywood Hank lounging on the couch contemplating a boneheaded move. (© image copyrighted, all rights reserved, no permissions granted)

Hollywood Hank lounging and contemplating where there’s a bone to pick. A quick snatch ‘n grab might be possible. (© image)

 


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14 Comments

Leave a Comment
  1. Kate Crimmins / Oct 24 2023 7:31 am

    That “magic” netting may be a problem for some inquisitive critters!

    Liked by 1 person

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Oct 27 2023 6:26 pm

      I keep watching, but so far no entangled squirrels….although the cat across the street has not lost hope.
      Stay snug this weekend!
      Thanks for wrapping in a comment here

      Liked by 1 person

  2. SusanR / Oct 24 2023 8:54 am

    I heard that “tall” was in this year, but those skeletons are … impressive.

    Liked by 1 person

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Oct 27 2023 6:24 pm

      Shortly we’ll see how those towering ghouls manage strong winds and thunderstorms…may look like a disturbed graveyard after that big front swoops in. Batten down the hatches ( and get that pup some snow booties up there!) Thanks for adding a glowing remark

      Like

  3. Ally Bean / Oct 24 2023 9:05 am

    I wonder if people who live in warmer climates just naturally gravitate to decorating their houses with more stuff than those of us who are very aware of who’ll be taking down huge decorations in the cold after October 31st?

    Liked by 1 person

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Oct 27 2023 6:22 pm

      (I think that one yard illustrated what some people did to avoid boredom during lockdown…Amazon made ordering so easy????)
      You may have something there. I always wonder about the giant Halloween and Christmas displays – they must take forever to put up and take down. I always watch weather for installation of Christmas lights…I hate fighting the soggy and dealing with wet items that must be dried before packing….it’s rain…cold rain or strong winds makes it worse…
      My parents would be floored at how many people hire companies to put up, take down, and store their lights.
      Getting closer and closer to the Williamsburg style of decorating: candle in window, and greenery on door. Ladders are not really my friend anymore!
      Thanks for lighting up the comment pile

      Liked by 1 person

  4. disperser / Oct 24 2023 9:17 am

    Are you sure you didn’t mean to say “Game of Bones”?

    Like

  5. Anne Mehrling / Oct 24 2023 9:53 am

    I’m still groaning from all those excellent puns.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. shoreacres / Oct 25 2023 8:26 am

    Those folks can decorate all they want — it still doesn’t feel as though Halloween. I see the candy displays in the stores and think, “Why are they putting that stuff out so early?” Ummm…. Perhaps I should be asking, “Why am I so far behind the curve?”

    Liked by 1 person

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Oct 27 2023 6:17 pm

      Do you think people are rushing towards warm memories and to escape ASAP – even for a little bit? Nothing brings more smiles each year than that a yard of swinging pumpkins. This may actually be the most wonderful time of the year! Thanks for rolling in with a comment

      Liked by 1 person

  7. sustainabilitea / Oct 25 2023 10:33 pm

    I do love a good pun so I’m quite happy. Bone meal, indeed. 😁

    Liked by 1 person

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