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October 20, 2021 / philosophermouseofthehedge

Wooden. You like.

red wagon full of pumpkins by stream in the foothills (© image copyrighted, all rights reserved. NO permissions granted)

It appears that the Orange Vegetable Invaders have hired transportation this year. (© image)

Our joy is boundless – yet another box has arrived. We knew (wink, wink) Staff would not be able to resist.

That Chewy’s sale email cleverly nudging everyone to shop early.

What? Yes, yes, while the new plush cat cave is quite lovely, but We have every reason to expect hope for additional tributes as Holler-ring is now fermenting and flourishing which means the Holly-yea season of Kiss-mess will be here before you know it. 

Now what have We here? Gifts for the family children? Ah, for little ones. Let Us have a look. We shall assist. We, RC Cat, are a Connoisseur of Gifts.

Wooden fruit lacing toy. (Image Amazon)

Wooden fruit lacing toy. (Image Amazon)

I not sure why a child would be given wooden fruit  – even finely crafted, elegant fruit such as these.

Given Perhaps so they won’t forget what fresh produce looks like? To give hope if one visualizes, it will come true? – we realized grocery shelves are thinly filled, but it seems cruel to offer not only ineatible foods – but imperfect ones with hole damage like worms would cause – A message to lower expectations? Phifft.

Oh? A fine motor skill toy. All, If this is typical playtime, no wonder humans grow up expecting things in life to be hopelessly tangled and tied into knots. What? We shall not discuss yarn balls.  

This, a sockin’ gift? Well named. We can see the smallest one helicoptering this and sockin’ anyone within string reach distance.

Such an odd assortment of gifts

Vintage handcrafted wooden toy. (Amazon)

“Vintage handcrafted wooden toy. No, No. Far too fine for sticky grubby little hands!” (Amazon)

This? Oh, Yes, Yes this one must actually be Ours. So royal looking. Truly a work of art.

Easily transported.

Easy to deploy the musket-type ball from a ledge to bonk, and tease entertain the dog with. Now you see it, and now it disappears safe and sound into it’s own little garage.  Quite nice.

Oh, it’s a game of skill to toss the ball, then try and catch it in the cup? Foolish. Shall not hold interest. Once the out of sight, it is out of mind!….so it must be Mine….

Wooden toy of skill ( Amazon)

“Now you see it. Now you don’t. The dog will never figure it out! No, We are not being mean. It is Our duty to challenge.” (Amazon)

We believe it can be used more appropriately during royal audiences. The lovely loud pop as the ball hops into hiding is perfect to signify Our  boredom …time is up and Staff must remove a annoying clueless individual.

Oh, (Wink, wink) Yes, yes, we know Santa will understand.

Old fashion Jacob's Ladder wooden toy

“A ladder? Phiff. Looks more like vintage stadium seating.”(Amazon image)

But I hope Santa has a little chat with the elves that constructed this – this – this thing called a ladder. Unclear on the concept of laddering.

First it is tiny – and second – it does not offer opportunity to step up or down.

The elves must have confused this with one of those moving, shifting, Harry Potter staircases. It is like that silly Chutes and Ladders game.

And such a loud clacking sound! We assume that is a warning that the steps are shifting and you’re doomed to slide off.

An optical illusion toy? No – it is plain to see, this is a defective ladder. Hopefully the Amazon return window has not closed on this item. 

Staff would be much less disappointed if ordering strictly from Chewy’s. We shall go and put their icon and link in first position on the computer preference shortcuts.

We live to inspire and serve. 

Of course hopefully Staff will be inspired to serve dinner a little early as our analysis and review of gifts have been so insightful. 

I am RC Cat and We approve this message.

Old fashion farm wagon decorated for fall with flowers and pumpkins (© image copyrighted, all rights reserved. NO permissions granted)

Old fashion Uber? Flourishing indeed. Is it possible the Orange Vegetable Invaders are trying a different tact this year: rolling in masquerading as flower delivery? (© image)

19 Comments

Leave a Comment
  1. easyweimaraner / Oct 20 2021 6:35 am

    I had such a wooden toys, my grand uncle made it for us… but the ball landed on my nose, so I preferred plastic toys as a kidlet ;O)

    Liked by 3 people

  2. cat9984 / Oct 20 2021 6:37 am

    Why would they shop anywhere else? Purrs, Snoops and Kommando Kitty

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Susie Lindau / Oct 20 2021 7:50 am

    Our family needs to pick names or everything will be picked over and we will be giving gift cards. Love the pumpkins but have no idea what the ladder could be, but agree about the seats. LOL!

    Liked by 3 people

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Oct 20 2021 12:09 pm

      RC Cat: “Actually those pumpkins are encamped in CO. We have encouraged them to halt there as the weather is more Orange Vegetable friendly and the Aspen landscape seem more fall like. We think they have fallen for it. A relief. We shall send the botanical gardens our thanks for the intercept. A gracious paw wave sent.”
      Bare shelves? You may have to resort to this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fId2cgUCkbA
      HAHA. Actually I stumbled across such a spinning toy on the National Parks’ store website during the lockdowns in attempt to amuse a couple of boarded kids (“Need something that actually required the kid doesn’t something to keep them busy that doesn’t flash or have loud sounds – help”) Sometimes simple is best?
      That’s an optical illusion “magic” toy that is also mesmerizing. I had one that was a red and blue plastic as a kid, but this wood one makes an even better clacking sound as it moves. Pretty ancient – as far back as Egypt. you can read how it works by clicking on that link and scrolling down, reading Wiki https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jacob%27s_ladder_(toy) or video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOxKGWH6e8Y
      Thanks for rolling by. Happy Playtime!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. disperser / Oct 20 2021 9:02 am

    I had fake cardboard toys . . . but they no longer make them. Actually, I’ve not seen fake cardboard for a long while now. Everyone is using the real stuff . . . for furniture.

    https://morningchores.com/cardboard-furniture/

    Liked by 3 people

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Oct 20 2021 11:34 am

      RC Cat: We approve of the heavy scratchy boxes layered across the wall on that site – and have shown it to staff – only to be told those are shelves not a piece of cat play equipment meant to be paired with carpeted cat towers….We appreciate your sending Us this link and will continue to educate staff on your intention. A grateful paw wave sent.
      Staff: Oddly enough there’s a section on the business channel now from Elkhart, Indiana’s manufacturing plant of packing materials plant…there’s a shortage of materials needed to make cardboard (not to mention trucking/wood pallet costs) – boxes or furniture. Demand is up. Hopefully recycling will come back in style for the general public.
      Thought you might get a grin over this spin: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fId2cgUCkbA

      Liked by 2 people

    • disperser / Oct 20 2021 1:11 pm

      Except for a brief period last year (they closed the recycling place) I recycle cardboard. When we had cats, I’d keep a few boxes around for them, but now I break them down.

      As for the spinning button, I actually used to make those when I was younger. I like the noise it makes because it’s somewhat reminiscent of a cat purring.

      RC Cat: show them this …
      https://vybecats.com/

      or this:

      https://www.cuteness.com/13208604/how-to-make-an-epic-diy-cat-castle-out-of-cardboard-boxes

      If they’re still resistant to it, decree that what you want is THIS:

      https://laughingsquid.com/elaborate-elevated-cat-perches-and-suspended-walkways/

      Liked by 3 people

      • philosophermouseofthehedge / Oct 20 2021 2:43 pm

        RC Cat: Now those are the cat’s meow! We are frustrated with showing similar elevated cat walks on TV shows. Sigh. Staff and Vet says We are not to jump so much now – no vertical lunges into Our loft even. However We have acquired a lovely cat cave on bin which feathers a lower bin patio porch that is easily ascended to. Now we can save Our spontaneous out of no where leaps over the dog and onto the tall bed. We shall not be restricted…unless it’s cold and We are just not interested. If Our paw would stop getting caught in the printer button, We would be able to print out Some of those images and create a Kiss-mess wish list…We shall continue attempting. A gracious nod in your direction.
        Staff: We keep boxes that have been selected for a brief time, but then fold them and put them out on recycling day. …where we often see them just get tossed into the regular garbage truck. So discouraging….they want up to buy clear plastic bags for all recycling items…buy more plastic in order to recycle….seems odd…a big box clearly labeled “Recycle ” and holding only folded cardboard is not sufficient….inmates are running the asylum. (Great links….purrhaps I should keep the boxes, cut and decorate, then sell the kitty kingdoms by the side of the road?

        Liked by 2 people

  5. Pied Type / Oct 20 2021 9:20 am

    I played with toys like that when I was a kid. Hadn’t thought about them in many years. But then, they are probably too simple to compete in this age of high tech everything.

    Liked by 2 people

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Oct 20 2021 11:22 am

      Surprisingly these very old fashion toys still entertain. It all started with the pandemic here when I was looking for small items to send to small kids stuck at home. The National Parks Service had one for sale their website. What a hit! A toy that the kid has to do think, and actively do something instead of just watching and being an audience to something flashing and making loud noises. The smiles that come with accomplishment. Also very soothing.
      Somehow simple is best. As aa result started rethinking what makes a good gift.
      Thanks for spinning around to watch here.
      (I didn’t know these had been found in graves/ancient ruins of civilizations all around the world. Here’s a how-to video to help someone get started.)

      Liked by 2 people

  6. Kate Crimmins / Oct 20 2021 1:12 pm

    Chewy enticed me with a sale too. All practical stuff except for the box which has thrilled the cats!

    Liked by 3 people

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Oct 20 2021 2:46 pm

      Staff: Scored the best cat cave ever on sale…it’s the best – also known as.the only one she has accepted and actually sleeps in. Mellowing with age, perhaps. (And OK a dog toy hidden for later. can’t show favoritisms)

      Liked by 3 people

  7. sustainabilitea / Oct 20 2021 6:46 pm

    Fun to see those old toys. We have some wooden toys that I picked up back when we lived in Ohio and put away against the day we had grandchildren or children for company. At those to an enormous container of Duplos and Legos, some Tinkertoys, and a plethora of small cowboys and Indians that were mine when I was a child and we’re well stocked. We also have several boxes of children’s books from when our girls were small. And now we have a first grandchild in the making. 🙂

    janet

    Liked by 3 people

  8. Ally Bean / Oct 22 2021 7:43 am

    I suppose with that *ladder* it all comes down to how you define it. We philistines don’t appreciate its abstract ladder-y artfulness. Or something like that.

    Liked by 2 people

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Oct 22 2021 9:01 am

      This is an very ancient toy evidently – along with the name’s reference that few even recognize now. An optical illusion toy, it baffles some/small children as it shifts and moves down. As a kid I inherited a blue and red plastic one from older brother and was quite smug knowing how it worked.
      I had to laugh at that picture as it looks more like and escalator.
      RC Cat however is not amused….it keeps snagging her claw as she tries to maneuver it…and she does not like to be embarrassed.
      Thanks for shifting a comment down here

      Liked by 2 people

  9. Curt Mekemson / Oct 22 2021 2:11 pm

    Cats love cardboard boxes. Many, many years ago when I was in the Peace Corps in Liberia we were asked to babysit a litter of kittens for a month with the promise of getting the pick of the litter. I include a version of this story in my book about my Peace Corps experience. It’s a bit long, but I decided it might amuse RC.

    “I had built our temporarily adopted cat family a three-story mansion out of cardboard. It was a maze of rooms, hanging toys, hallways and ramps. It even had a carpeted floor and a bathroom— a kitty litter box. The kittens would disappear inside and play for long periods. We could hear them banging around as they stalked each other and attacked the hanging toys.

    In a creative moment inspired by the evening cocktail hour, we decided to use the house as an intelligence test to determine which kitten we would keep. First, we waited until the kittens were appropriately hungry, and then we brewed up their favorite meal, fish head stew. Here’s the recipe: Take several ripe fish heads and throw them in a pan of boiling water. When their eyes pop out, they’re done.

    Next, we encouraged the kittens to sniff their gourmet dinner and showed them that the meal would be located just outside the ground floor door of their mansion. Now we were ready for the test. Each kitten would be placed inside the third story door and given a nudge. We would then close the door and time how long it took the kitten to reach the banquet. Our theory was that the kitten with the quickest time through the maze of hallways and ramps would be the brightest.

    Grey Kitten # 1 was a pudgy little character that never missed a meal. My money was riding on her. She breezed through the maze in three minutes sharp and set the time to beat. There was a chance that the sound of her munching away on fish heads might inspire the other kittens on to even greater glory, however.

    Grey Kitten #2 was one of those ‘whatever it is you want me to do I am going to do the opposite’ type cats. Not surprisingly, she strolled out of the door seven minutes later and ignored the food altogether. (Afterwards, we were to speculate that she was the most intelligent cat and blew the race because she had no intention of living with someone who made her go through a maze for dinner.)

    Grey Kitten #3 was the lean and mean version. Scrawny might be a better description. She obviously needed dinner the most and proved her mettle by blazing through the house in two minutes. The contest was all but over.

    Kitten # 4 was what pollsters normally classify as ‘other.’ To start with, she was yellow instead of grey. She was also loud. In honor of her operatic qualities, My wife had named her Brunhilda, after the Wagnerian opera star. By the time her turn came up, she was impatiently scratching the hand that was about to feed her and growling in a demonic way. I gladly shoved the little monster in the third story door and closed it. We heard a scrabbling on the other side as tiny claws dug into the cardboard floor. Her race down the first hall was punctuated by a loud crash on the other end. Brake problems.

    Then she was up and running again, but it sounded like toward us. Had her crash disoriented her? Suddenly the third story door burst open and one highly focused yellow kitty went flying through the air. She made a perfect four-point landing and dashed to the dinner dish. Her time? Ten seconds.

    And that is how Brunhilda came to be our cat. Our decision to keep her led us to turn her over and check out her brunhildahood a little more closely. Turns out she had a couple of furry little protuberances where there shouldn’t have been any. She was a he. In honor of Brunhilda’s demonic growl and generally obnoxious behavior, we renamed the kitten Rasputin after the nefarious Russian monk.”

    –Curt

    Liked by 3 people

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Oct 22 2021 2:54 pm

      RC Cat: “Now that’s really thinking out of the box. Hilarious and applaudable (and a kitten that probably developed into a wise and wonderful cat most worthy of the title RC Cat of the Realm! A Sturdy paw salute to you for being intelligent enough to see a real winner who must have bestowed much joy and many lessons to the Staff.”

      Liked by 2 people

      • Curt Mekemson / Oct 23 2021 5:30 pm

        Indeed, RC. Rasputin was a magnificent creature that didn’t only rule in our house, he constantly terrorized the neighborhood dogs. He would stalk them on windy days. I’d watch the dogs carefully avoid tall clumps of grass. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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