Driven to Whoa.

Had to renew driver’s license – in person.

I knew it was coming – also I knew there would be a meteor strike, hurricane, pandemic, Zombie Apocalypse, riot, flooding, road construction where all the exits are closed or have moved, a massive car wreck blocking the road on the way  – or a combination of all of the above – to make the experience even more fun.

Nothing like long lines with 3-6 hrs waits in the heat at the “new improved” consolidated regional Super Center for driver’s licenses…even if you managed to snag an appointment time on line. Those solidly booked for months and months.

When the Governor closed everything, people cheered the only good thing: no one could get driver’s licenses renewed for as long as the emergency declaration was in place.

And even after that people would have 60 days grace period once it was over.

Cult of the Mask? Mask up or die? Virtue signaling or extremist, difficult to say. People are so angry and narrow-minded now. Not worth the risk. We changed lanes. Of course this was perfect to set the mood for the morning event.(© image)

Only it’s not over and may never be

And these darn computer generated no doubt, letters keep arriving about “your license is about to expire…” with a completely contradictory statement also on it about…pandemic…emergency declaration…60 days grace period…etc. etc.

So why mail the letter if…

Pandemic recommendations are to avoid crowds, avoid small closed rooms full of people, and avoid surfaces touched by a lot of people.

Whyyyyyy couldn’t they just let me renew online one more time? One more time! I promise to show up in person next time, but no.

Even though the Federally mandated “special security” seal indicating you presented required documents to prove your identity has been put on pause.

But, no.

They want to see your smiling little face…and documents and fingerprints and all the rest to complete their not so little data hoard.

Spotted you and your little dog with expired tags, too! Ah-HaHaHaHaaaa.” (Halloween waving arm wiper sticker. Image: MIYSNEIRN/Amazon)

For a while I just shove the problem back. Why worry over nothing. Not driving anyway.

Any idea that it had anything to do with concerns over the aging eyes is totally out of line.

I have one far sighted eye and one near sighted eye – always worked fine up to now…only last eye doc visit seem to indicate they were becoming more same sighted eyes.

But nothing to worry about.

Recently, preferring to face a problem, get it over with, and not worry about it, I pulled up the DPS DMV website.

There had been rumors that some DMV offices were open.

Whispers said the one in our county was open half day and was super fast if you got there early ’cause no one knew about it. It was said you could actually schedule an appointment online. Even better, all forms were there so they could be filled out ahead of time

So I ventured a click – and was stunned to see weeks and weeks of open morning only appointments.

Yes! First appointment on a Wed. I’d roll out of bed in the dark, throw on clothes and tell the dog we’ll morning walk later. 

• Covid cases are really really low. With any second wave, along with flu season arriving, there might not be a better chance.
• Sooner or later the Governor’s going to tell people grace period is over (So you slackers, get moving…all 10-18 months worth of people crowding in to get licenses.)
• Besides it’s gorgeous weather so who else would possibly go to DMV when they really didn’t have to?
• In addition, this way the bad picture can be shrugged off as COVID haircut.

“Come on down. Of course it’s safe. We wouldn’t be open otherwise. You can trust your government agencies…”(Image.MIYSNEIRN / Amazon)

Of course there was construction, a massive wreck on the causeway bridge so the 25 min dash was more like a hour, but preemptively planned for difficulties, so no problema…with transit

The rumors were right about only 6-7 parking spaces. Who thinks 6-7 parking places are sufficient at the drivers’ license office?

And there was a line of 8 people already waiting for the door to open…and not all standing on the social distancing spacing lines.

But I had an appointment and filled out forms, so it still looked good.

The line went faster than expected – not uneventful.

• One woman stormed off when they wouldn’t let her in without a mask.
• Another Mom and teenage first time driver angrily left when told first timers had to make an appointment. Mom’s exit was far worse than the daughter’s.
• Another mom (with whimsical waist length rainbow hair) furiously departed when told she could come in, but her 8th grade daughter (with cute turquoise hair tucked under her baseball cap) would have to wait outside.

The rest of us clutched our papers. Worried about unexpected pitfalls.

“Does anyone here have an appointment?” (Oh, yea! Hands up!)

“What are you here for?”

“Do you have any COVID symptoms? Have you been around anyone with COVID symptoms? Let me take your temperature.”

“Do you have the required documents? Passport?”

With all the forms filled out, I got to step up to the line and read the eye chart. A real old fashioned eye chart! Comfort level much improved.

I hate those lean over and stare into those attached to the counter View-Master type featuring lighted letters to read on one side at a time. Those seemed germy even before COVID.

YEA! Only had to read the bottom line with one eye twice. Whew.

In case the reference was a mystery. View-Master Model G is a stereo-scope that used cardboard discs with cellophane film images in full color around it. Seems like some were 3-D. These used to make my eyes hurt as I tried to focus.(USPD/Commons.wikimedia.org)

Other than my reading glasses fogging up at the check-in to the DMV computer kiosk (which oddly is done after all the rest), it was pretty fast…2 counter spots, not much waiting with only the 2 employees and 2 people allowed in at a time.

De-masked, smile, click, and done….

After weaving way through some unhappy people sort of line-lumped outside the door.

Giggled over the hefty, gold chain ladened, wanna-be rapper who parked his vehicle with California plates absolutely in the middle of the filled tiny L-shaped parking lot driveway. (Dude. Yawn. We have actual big time rappers locally. You may have been hot snot in Cali, but…)

Normally, since already on Galveston Island, it would be a nice beach stroll, maybe wander The Strand and some antique shop, take a few pictures of wharfs, dunes, or historic houses. Then a nice seafood lunch.

But it’s not normal.

Still, the driver’s license is updated: a small normal better than no normal.

Phil, the Philosopher Mouse of the Hedge

Hey I got an idea, if we have to show multiple documents and photo ID proving who we are to get a driver’s license, what about something like that for voting? (Says the victim of long term voter fraud using my name. Raising awareness and fighting voter fraud since 2011)

I think this one’s mine. (Image MIYSNEIRN/Amazon)

Signal to the world you’re worried about a second COVID outbreak? Taking time to wave you down, if you’re so driven, here’s where you find Hockey mask killer waving arm windshield wiper decal. They have Santa and reindeer, too. While Molly Malamute was disappointed in the growling German Shepherd, and paw waving Husky, we give paws up for the tail wagging Dalmatian and the really cute beaver.(Image: MIYSNEIRN/Amazon)

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