A German’s Ode to Joy

The panic attacks are less. It just that she’s so attractive. People smile and walk towards us when we are out. They never see it: that the smile on her face suddenly freezes. Or that small defensive step backwards. Or that her eyes searching for escape routes.

A victim of workplace violence.

She tries to maintain composure, remembering her manners. But I can see it in the tensing of her shoulders: “Do they always have to rush over? Do I have to stay and be introduced and exchange pleasantries?” I manage to disengage us. She can’t wait to get to the car: the enclosure representing safety – and escape. Windows to see through – be part of the world – with a barrier to safely hide behind.

Uncomfortable, but a tiny step.

Just doing her job. What she was trained to do. Took a stand to serve and protect – and took the blows. Recovery was fairly rapid the first time with encouragement and rest. But the second, I think it was the child. Despite her memories, she summoned up courage to stand again. But the child. They shoved a child out in front. A child. A small human normally to be protected. She hesitated – generations of genetics and years of training in play. But this child held the Taser. A moment of kindness cost her. Now once again battered, confused, and reconsidering everything she thought she knew was true.

Even German Shepherds get the blues.

So she’s in recovery: regaining confidence and re-grasping that guiding star. Not gathering up all her toys on her blanket and curling up on top of them in fetal position as frequently. Eager now to saunter down the sidewalk (but still seriously regarding and evaluating any human in sight). Relieved to have almost constant quiet companionship, maybe seen as back-up? Able to put down the job and relax a bit. Flashbacks unexpectedly lunge forward; small things abruptly trigger. Yet everything here is safe. And she’s not in charge. So day by day she is able to sit in the sun soaking up soothing vitamin D and appreciating the small birds’ serenade. Pleased she can offer some small appreciated service in return: keeping cats out of their yard. The walled refuge soothes her. Small joys rediscovered. A sense of play re-emerging.

Time heals all. Slowly rebuilding that age-old unspoken bond with humans: trust. It’s obvious she’s mulling it over on occasion. She’s trying to analyze the Great Betrayal: humans attacking so violently – so unexpectedly – armed with lightning in the form of stun guns and Tasers. She was just doing her job, following her training. Serve and Protect. Then, a sigh and a “put that aside.” Things used to be so simple. Not this time.

German Shepherd in training (USAF photo by Robbin Cresswell)

Police dogs are grateful for donated protective / bullet proof  vests. Susie Jean has raised money and donated vests to K9 corps in 41 states. Here’s the story and how you can help. Watch the NBC video about a Florida police dog, shot twice, but saved by a vest.

Appreciating the devoted,

Phil, the Philosopher Mouse of the Hedge

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