Sure and pleasant, but stranger

How funny. It’s all about the birds, isn’t it? (USPD)

Let it be known that two things are true: 1). it is pointless to making instructional videos for birds, and 2) it’s not what it looks like.

Despite recent events have revealed that local birds desperately need strategies to cope with territorial infringement by wintering tourist birds, it has been determined by RC Cat (who has infinite delusions experience in Realm defensive strategies) that birds are simply too flighty to learn to help themselves.

“After leaping from your hiding spot, one should gaze into the eyes of prey victim opponent fiercely and…Wait! The lesson isn’t over. Stop. Don’t fly off yet. Dunderbirds. (USPD)

Unable to put aside hard-wired unfounded cat distrust prejudices – and lacking the abilities to accept help from a former rival during troubled times – the birds simply got all aflutter during practice demonstrations.

RC shrugged and said with regret, “Some simply do not have the killer instinct.”

She suggested the local birds contract out with purrrcenaries.

But it was revealed that wings, an angel do not make.

“If feathers are used for arrows, then there is nothing wrong with me using the finished product. Only at tin cans. Oh, the dead body over there? Must have been standing too close to the tin can.”(USPD)

Robins and sparrows, seemly meek and mild, actually have a long, violent, Hatfield and McCoy feud-type history.

• The “Death of Cock Robin” or “the Death and Burial of Cock Robin” is an English nursery rhyme describing the murder and funeral of a robin. (Deemed appropriate for children of all ages. So do not mention modern video games violence as not being instructive for children. It’s tradition.)
• 1744 seems to be the first published Robin version in “Tommy Thumb’s Pretty Song Book” with only four verses.
• Popular demand? 1770 there was an extended version. There were many parodies and spin offs. Byron even used it in “Who killed John Keats”.
• The “Trial and Execution of Sparrow for Killing Cock Robin” followed shortly with a court case, witnesses, and interrogation. (The English are apparently serious about their birds…and justice). Who was the murderer: the sparrow or was it the cat? In this version, Judge Hawk decides the accused is guilty and deals out the punishment with his own beak. (No appeal process there).

Appalled at the stuffed unmatched pall bearers? Funeral ceremonies differ widely. (USPD)

• 1861 A taxidermist created a tableau of each of the rhyme’s stanzas using 98 embalmed birds. He featured a bullfinch tolling the bell instead of a bull reflecting the early versions. (Before you flinch and talk about gross, consider the modern exhibit “Body Works and the Cycle of Life” with preserved human specimens…)

As with many rhymes and childhood poems, actually history is frequently suggested and linked.

• Could be Celtic. Could be Norse. Could be from Germany.
• But old nursery rhyme probably revised to reflect European and English politics. Could refer to 1100 death of King William II (called “Rufus” which means red) who was killed by an arrow in the woods. Might be derived from a similar political dead bird story, Phyllyp Sparowe, written by John Skelton (poet/political satirist) in 1508. Very likely connected to fall of Robert Walpole’s 1742 government.

We know why and how the caged bird sings. 

(To keep the head firmly attached to the body.) 

Well, some reading specialist possibly was involved with the text: high frequency words, rhyme, and rhythm appropriate for beginning readers. Maybe the illustrations are to keep the adults engaged. My, how children’s books have changed. (USPD)

If intrigued by old book illustrations, some the best and most elaborate of this robin’s tale are here in the Project Gutenberg e-book from 1865. (See sample above. No political agenda.Obviously simply written and illustrated for a child, right?)

RC Cat has grown weary of beak speech and has abandoned ideas of instructional videos for the local birds. Some recently discovered educational materials (shown below) may work better. Her work proclaimed done, HRH has returned to her sunny spot. 

Nothing but chirp

Phil, the Philosopher of the Hedge

Robin’s dead. Who dun it? Justice! Will nests go up in flames? (USPD)

Cock Robin and his wife Jenny Wren enjoying dinner with pie and wine. Incoming. Incoming. “Duck, Robin, duck. Sorry, I meant, move it.” Surprise attack just like with diners in DC. (USPD)

In this version, it’s a wren, not a dove that mourns Cock Robin. This sequel to the book above includes the lamentation of Jenny Wren, the apprehension of Sparrow, and the Cuckoo’s punishment. Victimhood and crime literature is so marketable. (USPD)

Here comes the Judge. Here comes the Judge. Looks serious. No fluff here, but some great vocabulary. (USPD)