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April 6, 2020 / philosophermouseofthehedge

RC Cat: Begging Basil. Taming the Dread Mill

It was the Mess of Times and the Mirth of Times.

(That’s the correct quote. Not the thinly veiled plagiarized attempt by that author..)

In this era of fake blues, despite the misinformation, Basil has not left the building.

Try the patio.

That’s where Staff has been begging for a second chance.

With Basil.

Man in vintage suit standing with hands on hips. Actor Basil Rathbone in 1946 "Dressed to Kill". Universal Pictures (, artist life/

Actor Basil Rathbone in 1946 film “Dressed to Kill”. Despite the ironic title, he does look like a man of elegance who would be at home in the Realm. Probably knows how to deal with Staff. A benefit. We could delegate some duties. (USPD/

We were quite thrilled for a brief period when it seemed a vintage movie star was somehow making an appearance.

Odd, yes, considering. But these are strange days.

And there have been miracles with cloning dogs, so We assumed some scientific advancements had been made with human subjects which may be next on the evolutionary scale above dogs…both far below cats in the hierarchy of intelligence.

As it turns out, Staff is trying coax the remaining straggler of last year’s basil to live another season.

Basil is a lovely seasoning. We agree.

Still if would have been lovely if Mr. Rathbone could have been planted here for a while to amuse us.

Basil plant. (© image copyrighted, all rights reserved, No permissions granted )

“You see the problem, yes? Stick-to-it-mess is not always a good thing.” (© image)

The life ands death plant struggle is Staff’s own fault.

During several winter cold spells, the large container nurturing basil was not shoved snuggly into the corner by the window and tucked under the wide sheltering container palm fronds. No. Staff foolishly left the poor basil plant shivering against the wind – huddled on the plant perimeter – thinking she would just go buy new plants in the spring at that charming Maas Nursery.

“Never count your basils before they are planted,” We warned. But not heeded.

Not wanting to admit defeat, Staff has been whispering encouragement shamelessly pleading and offering tributes of what little fresh potting soil mix is left.

Phiff. Better put some scarecats in that pot to ward off sunning lizards or that Molly Malamute will be attempting a container clogging dance trying to catch one.

We shall see.

Stand still! Your social distancing skills are appreciative and impressive, but that continuous inching backwards is annoying.

Cat on window seat holding onto treadmill. (© image. Copyrighted, all rights reserved, No permissions granted)

“Yes, We grow weary, but duty calls. Like an earthquake warning system which alerts when trembling occurs, We shall protect you.”(© image.)

Oh, you are probably anxious being so close to the Mill of Dread. Understandable.

For years, We, Ourselves, had paid little attention to this Dread Mill.

Normally silent like an ancient volcano.

Only a rumble now and then.

It must have felt neglected. Staff is around 24/7, yet is not in step with it. 

exercise equipment. Treadmill next to elliptical. (© image. Copyrighted, All rights reserved. No Permissions granted)

Once they were the oddest couple but, still, a pair: young, sleek, and running with the fast crowd. Perhaps the solitary Dread Mill is lonely? (© image)

Recently We were suddenly jolted out of catnip overload meditation as it roared and erupted to life.

Disregarding Our own safety, We leap off Our sunny window seat in an attempt to warn Staff of possible danger, only to have Our front paws whipped right – right out from under Us – then while struggling to auto-correct with Our back paws on the moving platform, We were flipped 360 degrees in the air and unceremonious flung off the back.

Quite unsettling unnecessary.

Of course, We stuck the landing as well as an Olympic gymnast and marched with eyes shocked, stiff ears wide, and fur spiked with dignity over to Staff to warn them the machine seemed to be rolling out a grudge and to tread carefully.

Knowing the Dunderheads forget, We now spend a good part of the day holding the Dread Mill still with Our paw.

A commanding touch tames the most savage.

In these days of worry, We shall always offer a path…No, We do not refer to the jibblets of litter down the hallway!

Honestly, somedays We do not know why We bother.

We shall offer Windows of Calm to you. even though it is like casting pearls before swine.

You cannot get to the Garden of Maas either, so We have brought a glimpse to you as it was the setting for this little film.

You can watch on your way out.

Staff! They are overwhelmed with Our kindness.

Somebody point them to the door Staff! Please, be so kind to assist them.

Our paw has waved.

Audience over. Fini.

And don’t forget to leave the tribute of an open can of food in the doorway.

crown symbol with message "I am RC Cat and I approve this message"

I am RC Cat and I approve this message.





Leave a Comment
  1. shoreacres / Apr 6 2020 7:04 am

    Maas is open! Check their website for new hours and new procedures — but you can get there from here. I love those windchimes — I have the same sort that were given to me as a birthday gift many years (actually, many lifetimes) ago. Mine are alto pentatonic, and I finally got them hung. The good news is that my neighbors all love them.


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 6 2020 8:04 am

      RC Cat: “Yes. Yes. We had noticed their offerings Purrhaps Staff may be allowed to slip over…not on a nice day…only if raining and no one else would consider…they have rain gear and it would be motivation not to dawdle. While Maas has some lovely deep toned chimes, Staff talks endlessly of their regret of not purchasing Arcosanti wind chimes – yes, yes, many lifetimes ago. We are so pleased your neighbors are enlightened enough to appreciate. A brief paw wave – brief as as you know We must soothe the grumpy Mill of Dread.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. easyweimaraner / Apr 6 2020 7:05 am

    the staff will buy such a thingy for us… you can place a bet if we will use it… or not LOL


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 6 2020 8:09 am

      RC Cat: We feel this ancient artifact that is older than Ourselves would make a nice garden sculpture. Patio lights could be draped on it – at least it would be useful there. A paw salute for your constant bravery in your garden realm. Toodles ( The quaint little phrase used casually among companions. We are friends, n’est-ce pas? We are trying it out – it makes Us giggle….no We have not been rolling in the catnip….)


  3. Ally Bean / Apr 6 2020 8:16 am

    One has to roll one’s eyes when one’s staff become complacent. It’s not easy being green, or a cat in charge.

    Liked by 1 person

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 7 2020 10:40 am

      RC Cat: “Thank goodness there are some enlightened ones around. A quick paw salute sent your way. We apologize for the wave brevity, but the Mill, you know.”

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Kate Crimmins / Apr 6 2020 9:08 am

    I was delighted that last year’s parsley plant has resurrected itself (just in time for Easter too). It’s too early for basil here, at least outside. We also have a dread mill in the basement but it gets use from the other human. The cats and I won’t touch it with a 10 foot pole!

    Liked by 1 person

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 7 2020 10:48 am

      RC Cat: “That contraption is certainly not what We meant when We said ‘It is good to have the run of things.’ Humans are so easily confused. It is tiresome. Beginning to feel like that story about the Dutch boy holding back flood waters with his finger…We always wondered, after a while, did leaks occur as his finger wrinkled and shriveled? And was he ridiculed for failure of duty? The stories never end at the end. Oh, look a flutterby on the window…We shall take a brief respite and bap at that…you will tell no one, yes? You’d better leave so no one can question you. Au revoir!”

      Liked by 1 person

  5. sustainabilitea / Apr 6 2020 8:00 pm

    Love that opening quote.


    Liked by 1 person

  6. marina kanavaki / Apr 7 2020 1:25 am

    Reading your post, listening to Alan Watts voice and those wind chimes work wonders! Thank you, my friend! 😉
    ps Most pet shops are leaving small packs of dry food outside their shops, with the note: It’s free / get one / feed a stray!


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 7 2020 7:16 am

      We can all use a few soothing sounds and calming paws. Cheered you’re listening
      (And also pleased the pet stores are so kind there. We’re all connected and all matter)

      Liked by 1 person

  7. disperser / Apr 7 2020 8:57 am

    Funny . . . in days past, when we had both a treadmill and cats, I’ve never seen them show any concern for our safety. Your overlords must be more altruistic than ours.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. cat9984 / Apr 9 2020 8:42 am

    It appears that you have the situation under control, as usual. Purrs Snoops and Kommando Kitty 🐱🐱


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 9 2020 9:50 am

      RC Cat. “Things are running along here. Not always smoothly, but running along. Catapulting cheer and hope your way. Paws in solidarity!”

      Liked by 1 person

Always glad to hear from readers.

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