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April 1, 2019 / philosophermouseofthehedge

Not fooling, April.

Dog dressed for dinner. (Brownie the dog film star, 1921. Century Film/Universal Px/Motion Picture News, 1021/USPD.pub.date, artist life/Commons.wikimedia.org)

“Now that I have your attention. Bow. No, not woof. I mean it. Genuflect, fools” (Brownie the dog film star, 1921/USPD/Commons.wikimedia.org)

Punk humans? Fine. To be expected. But leave man’s best friend out of it.

“Roku introduces the Press Paws remote”

Features:

  • Animal-themed shortcut buttons: Animal Planet is one stomp away!
  • Bark assistant technology: bark-to-play, bark-to-pause, bark-to-mute, bark-to-confirm-there’s-a-box-at-the-door
  • Built in Sub-woofer, naturally. Enhanced sound worth howling at

Available April 1st!

More stupid human tricks:

  1. After much hype, the first all female space walk didn’t happen. No dress rehearsal. Really. Packing failure: Only one space suit built for female astronauts. What? Doesn’t duct tape fix just about anything? Where are those high level thinking skills. Not optimistic how humankind will survive on the moon or planets without Home Depot or dressmaker /tailor shops. Maybe Amazon’s drones will be up and running – and offering 2 day deliveries.
  2. Almost on the same day House Speaker Nancy Pelosi was floating out letting 16-yr-olds vote, the Texas House passed bill to raise legal age to be tried as an adult to 18. Texas was only one of 6 remaining states that hold 17-yr-olds accountable as adult for crimes. The science is pretty clear that the areas in the brain responsible for impulse control, control over emotions, understanding cause and effects, understanding consequences for actions, logic and reasoning, being able to participate in their own defense are not fully developed and functioning during the teen years. Not able to know right from wrong. Of course, keeping convicted teens in spaces built for minors rather than having to protect them in the adult general criminal population is also cheaper. Have to look behind all the talking to see the real motivation these days.
  3. : “The C8 Corvette is so powerful it keeps bending its frame” This the beginning of an AI muscled metal overpowering the designers? “C8″ Chevrolet Corvette mid engine is not only problems with the 100 interlinked computers” (See, I told ya. There’s computer chatter and who knows what they are talking about), but it seems they’ve created  “too much beastly power”  Reports have leaked that when the pedal’s to the metal the car “suffered from structural distortion so severe that the engine compartment’s glass hatch was breaking.”(Please, not a marketing gimmick to attract females determined to break all life’s glass ceilings.) There have been rumors the car’s “acceleration so “frightening” that GM has supposedly consulted with lawyers about the potential risk of selling something so fast.” Marketing or big problem. In any case, how useful is a car that gets bent all outta shape delivering on its’ promises?
  4. Happy Birthday to my mom and her older brother, my uncle. (or it would have been) Everyone else in the world thought it was funny, but the siblings hated it: not only the foolish date of birth, but they also had to share it. Never out grew the annoyance. Now carved in stones.

May April’s fools and showers not make you glower

Phil, the Philosopher Mouse of the Hedge.

Scared woman. 1929 Universal Pictures/USPD.pub.date, artist life/Commons.wikimedia.org)

“Oh, come on, Grandma. You couldn’t hold it in for just a few hours more? Just fooling’!” (USPD/Commons.wikimedia.org)

31 Comments

Leave a Comment
  1. Kate Crimmins / Apr 1 2019 6:40 am

    I know adults who have not developed the regions of their brain responsible for impulse control. Is there an app for that?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. shoreacres / Apr 1 2019 6:50 am

    It’s perhaps (perhaps?) a sign of our times that I had to click over to that Roku piece just to be sure it wasn’t real. Given the way things are going, you never know. Now, I’m thinking. What if we could develop a remote to shut off politicians. Now, that would be an invention worth pursuing!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. easyweimaraner / Apr 1 2019 6:53 am

    we think the space walk think makes sense.. specially when that space cowgirl is our mama LOL

    Liked by 1 person

  4. RKLikesReeses / Apr 1 2019 7:03 am

    EVERYTHING about this post is perfect. ::applause:: & ::giggles:: & (((((hugs)))))) – You ROCK!!!

    LOL just saw that Roku thing in passing on Twitter, didn’t stop to look, assumed it was another channel for dogs. Thank you for posting about it. The non-reality is much better!!!!
    (Where do I get one of those ‘Vettes? I’ll bet the computers are holding it back. Turn ’em off and acceleration would probably twist the frame into a pretzel.)
    🙂

    Like

  5. sustainabilitea / Apr 1 2019 7:46 pm

    A birthday on April Fool’s Day? Oh, no!! I had a friend whose birthday was right a day away from Christmas. She said she never got as many gifts because everyone was already burned out. 🙂

    janet

    Liked by 1 person

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 2 2019 7:27 am

      That poor kid was prime candidate for a “summer Christmas birthday”. I had a co-worker, Christian, who announced the day he was hired that his birthday was Dec 26, but he had always celebrated it June 26 because his parents said his actual birthday just wasn’t fair – not fair to give one gift and say “here – this is for Christmas and birthday” – and besides, everyone deserves to have their own birthday party focused on. The idea seemed reasonable option for a kid.
      The kids born on a leap year’s extra day – must either love it or absolutely hate it.
      Thanks for wrapping up a comment to leave

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Robin / Apr 2 2019 5:12 am

    I was astounded at the lack of space suits for women. They are in space. Shouldn’t they be better prepared? It’s not like Amazon DOES deliver to the ISS. (Yet.) And given the way the rocket going to the ISS with supplies blew up here a few years ago, deliveries are not guaranteed. (Yet.)

    With all the hoopla about Nancy Pelosi being a mother and a grandmother, you’d think she’d know better. Then again, there are some adults who seem to be lacking in the brain development area so maybe it wouldn’t matter. Critical thinking is not much in demand these days.

    Liked by 1 person

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 2 2019 7:13 am

      I was wondering if there was a small frame unisex suit available for emergencies. (Although the plumbing might be a bit different) and NASA’s PR people were fretting about “what is something happened while both were out there – it would be a disaster to have both women injured – people still shiver over deadly NASA flights and crew deaths….is it worth risking…”
      Or maybe the manufacturer charges more to make female suits – like women’s clothing is usually marked up much higher than men’s mark up. I dunno, but sounds pretty odd.
      You are right about Pelosi – moms/grandmoms who are actually there, observed kids, deal with kids 24-7 know teenage logic and behavior…Those that outsource parenting, maybe not.
      Or maybe something else is more important…which directly ties in to your last 2 sentences.
      Thanks for taking time to hike over and chat.

      Like

  7. Ally Bean / Apr 2 2019 11:33 am

    I’m not a fan of April Fool’s Day so I feel great sympathy for your late mother and uncle. And now it’s on their tombstones. It might be accurate but it’s not fair at all.

    Liked by 1 person

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 2 2019 2:49 pm

      What a burden their birthday must have been when they were little kids.
      You know this April’s Fool Day was unusual with all the really funny company pranks – high quality spoofs and much better than last Super Bowl’s commercial. Hope it’s a trend. Fun is good!
      Thanks for slipping a word in here

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Anne Mehrling / Apr 4 2019 3:03 pm

    That is amusing that your mother and her brother hated sharing their April 1 birthday.

    Liked by 1 person

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 4 2019 5:40 pm

      Apparently dual birthdays was a thing at one time. For convenience or for novelty, I can’t say. Thanks for giving a grin, again

      Like

      • Anne Mehrling / Apr 4 2019 7:53 pm

        Our daughters have birthdays one day apart. That worked well for us.

        Liked by 1 person

        • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 5 2019 6:37 am

          All the party cleanups limited to just a few days!

          Like

          • Anne Mehrling / Apr 5 2019 7:16 am

            I made a mistake only once. One child got an invitation with the wrong date. I ran out and caught the mother, who cheerfully agreed to bring her daughter back the next day.

            Liked by 1 person

          • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 5 2019 7:32 am

            That’s funny – all mothers can identify with being in overload at one time or another – and willing to over look a slip!

            Like

          • Anne Mehrling / Apr 5 2019 8:14 am

            I wonder if you mother and uncle ever shared a birthday party. I’ll bet not.

            Like

          • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 5 2019 8:16 am

            Oh, yes they did – all their childhoods….weren’t happy about that

            Like

          • Anne Mehrling / Apr 5 2019 8:24 am

            Oh, dear! I certainly understand. My girls would not have been happy to share a party, simply because of the age difference. I had it easy. I decorated a small cake on a pedestal. Each party had its own big cake under it. I’m glad the girls were willing to have the same theme.

            Liked by 1 person

          • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 5 2019 8:50 am

            Whew. Problems avoided! Family united saved!

            Liked by 1 person

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