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May 18, 2016 / philosophermouseofthehedge

Beauties facing off

Crushed under the ugly political clatter, no wonder people are picking a peace of beauty (which, of course, is in the eye of those holding it.)

Everyone deserves a beauty break. Even if there are costs.

JJ. Smith and some of his beauty contestants. He makes the smiles brighter.. (

He makes the smiles brighter. (

If  J.J. Smith is coaching, it may cost a pretty penny.

Known as the King of Queens, J.J. has shaped more beauty pageant winners than you can shake a rose at.

Priceless bit of advice from him? “Be a first class version of yourself, not a second class version of someone else.” Wise words for any of life’s contests.

His secret to winning? “Nailing the interview” Answering the hard questions.

Beauty pageant hopefuls aren’t the only ones seeking him out recently. JJ says he’s seeing more job applicants and businessmen seeking advice.

Gee, do ya’ think presidential candidates should sign up for some instruction? After all, it’s so much of a beauty contest.

“Crowned king of beauty queens shares secrets to his success” (VIDEO.abc13)

“King of Queens shows what it takes to be a Pageant Queen” (VIDEO.39.NewsFix)

“The Coaching Kind of Pageant Queens” Houstonia Magazine article. (Lot of beauties and pictures in this behind the scenes look.)

After any interview, JJ says people still to strut their stuff and be real.

Maybe cause a few wolf whistles. (Do they still risk doing that?)

This one does. A real howl or two even.

Husky friends all made up. (YouTube. llanaMkeup artist.)

Husky friends all made up.(Screenshot.ilana’s YouTube)

You can watch makeup artist ilana’s step by step transformation from beauty to beautiful beast now in English.

Or if big cats are more your thing,  grab her tiger tale here.

Not to be catty, some claim one must suffer for beauty.

Probably quickly followed by “Suffer in silence, PLEASE.

You know what they say: “Beauty is as beauty does”.

Face it. Fads are beautiful fun.

For a while everyone pouted for Duck Face selfies only to drop those for the sultry and slimming Fish Gape selfies.

Recently, the selfie face has been handed a new accessory: T. REX Hands. (If the Kardashians and other celebs are in, others will follow the trend?)

Kinda reminds me of the desperate to be the first on the block fad variations with Planking, Coning, Leisure Diving, Horsemanning (like headless horseman), Batmanning, and Owling a few years ago. Anyone remember those? (Refresh 2011 fads’ posts here.)

Hey, it is too similar – fads of increasing levels of difficulty presenting more and more dangerous situations: ever spike your eye with a nail? Talk about suffering…

No contest, Beauty. (A winning neigh.)

Phil, the Philosopher Mouse of the Hedge

man and woman with horse. 1921 Film Black Beauty. (Photoplay magazine. Vitagraph Co. of America. USPD:, exp. cr./

Listen kiddies do not fall for that “If you make straight A’s in school you can have a horse.” Oh, nay. And I did not suffer in silence. No beauty in that. (1921 Film “Black Beauty”USPD/








  1. shoreacres / May 18 2016 6:56 am

    Those fads you mention? The only one I knew was planking — and I haven’t a clue about these duck faces. My conviction that it’s possible to remove myself from the madness seems to be on target. The fact that most of this post makes no sense isn’t your fault. It’s because so many of the references just don’t connect. I could write a book about how disquieting that is (or a blog post), but I think I’ll just let it be.

    The makeup artist is pretty cool, though. There’s a question: if you could be made up to look like any animal in the world, what would it be?

    Liked by 1 person

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 18 2016 7:23 am

      It falls to me to clue you in on stuff you haven’t had time to keep up with HA HA. One of my last office tethers had a large number of recent univ. grads who kept me up on stuff like My Space vs Facebook and fad. Lots of fun. And the blog posts of that era got lots of view and were right up there on Google searches – which was fun, too.
      Makeup washes off. I’d like to be an animal that can run if necessary and lives far away from roadways. A mustang on western prairie long long ago. Now with helicopters, drones, and land management, they are dog meat. Now Molly has a pretty good deal. Thanks for dressing up the comment closet


  2. roughwighting / May 18 2016 6:57 am

    “Be a first class version of yourself, not a second class version of someone else.” Great advice for all of us!! And should be taught to the younger set, who are growing up sharing all of themselves on Facebook and Twitter and Instagram, etc.

    Liked by 2 people

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 18 2016 7:25 am

      He’s a local guy and strange to many, but gives a lot of solid commonsense that works in any field. Just goes to show there’s a perfect spot for everyone and if people play to their strengths instead of weeping about what they can’t do, life can be good. Thanks for adding a crowning comment

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Paul / May 18 2016 8:18 am

    Interesting guy.


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 18 2016 8:33 am

      The husky, right? Man or beast, work with what you’ve got and be authentic. Genuine is always beautiful. Thanks for dressing up a comment for this pageant

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Ally Bean / May 18 2016 9:12 am

    Fads usually pass right by me and beauty pageants don’t draw me in, but if this man can help others do what they want to do better, then more power to him. What a character.


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 18 2016 11:12 am

      JJ is a hoot. The world he ended up in is so far from where he started. Prime example of finding what you do well and like and then, no matter what anyone says, go in that direction and work hard to become master of that field. Pageants are pretty humorous to me – much better before they became big business and you enjoyed what they passed off as “talent”. Still anything that gets the young up on stage in front of people and teaches some manners and poise is a good thing – important skills for life (as well as learning to lose graciously). Thanks for hitting this runway with a comment

      Liked by 1 person

      • Ally Bean / May 18 2016 11:24 am

        Good point about learning to lose with grace. There can never be too much grace in this world.


        • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 18 2016 11:31 am

          That’s it. Congress has to write an addition to the requirements for presidential office. Your comment wins the crown

          Liked by 1 person

  5. RKLikesReeses / May 18 2016 9:16 am

    Giggling and sighing, in turn. Chasing beauty can get ugly, esp when fads are involved. But this? “Be a first class version of yourself, not a second class version of someone else.” Timeless advice. Love the husky-faces! ::applause::


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 18 2016 11:14 am

      Even the most ridiculous events can hold valuable lessons for life. You have to applaud JJ. Thanks for strutting down the blogway accessorized with a comment

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Kate Crimmins / May 18 2016 9:46 am

    Damn I missed the whole duck face selfie! Now I have to start working on T Rex hands. Super sigh!


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 18 2016 11:24 am

      No matter how fast you zip along, it’s hard to keep up.Those Kardashian girls keep everyone hopping with their latest selfie versions.(and now Iran is accusing Kim of being a secret agent to promote “unIslamic Instagram use” to their young population. As much as she’s on social media, how could should possibly have any secrets?
      Sigh, back to whacking the hedge and avoid chopping the mosquito eating lizards
      Thanks for dressing up a comment for this pageant

      Liked by 1 person

  7. D. Wallace Peach / May 18 2016 10:01 am

    “Be a first class version of yourself, not a second class version of someone else.” I love that. What great advice. And yes, there are a few politicians that ought to hire him – except that it’s probably better in the long run that we see their true personalities 😦


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 18 2016 11:29 am

      It’s a great line – especially when he follows up with “then get out there and strut your stuff and be real. Always be genuine and authentic”
      No doubt politicians might learn some manners and manage the first quote, but the second one might be impossible. You may be right, difficult enough to determine who is really a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Thanks for entering a pageant worthy comment

      Liked by 1 person

  8. pegoleg / May 18 2016 11:51 am

    T-Rex hands????? I did not know about this. Either I need to get with the program, or the entire Kardashian/Jenner clan needs to get a grip on real life!


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 18 2016 2:52 pm

      And people say science studies are a waste of time! They always say only if students internalize information and then use it in new ways, did they actually learn anything. Waaay to much time on those T-Rex-es. Thank for adding a clawsome comment


  9. angelswhisper2011 / May 19 2016 1:30 am

    I think I have a kind of T Rex paws, Philmouse, but they come natural to me, no need to be second hand..ed 😉 Pawkisses for a Beautiful Day 🙂 ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Robin / May 19 2016 9:28 am

    Interesting and fun post, as always. Love the wolf and tiger faces. I’m going to practice my fish gape now. 😉


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 19 2016 9:36 am

      Is it just me or does it seem that people just can’t help bringing out the animal in themselves? Thanks for taking a look in this mirror!


  11. colonialist / May 19 2016 4:17 pm

    Beauty in the ‘Aye’ of the beholder? Of course, bee holders often get stung!


  12. Kourtney Heintz / May 25 2016 10:03 am

    That’s a terrific piece of advice: “Be a first class version of yourself, not a second class version of someone else.” Love your humor here. Great post!


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