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March 23, 2015 / philosophermouseofthehedge

As the squirrels squirm

Small boy in safari suit. (1948. Moshe Safdie.CBS Sunday Morning/youtube)

It’s a jungle out there. (1948.CBS Sunday Morning/YouTube)

Intense. Not-breathing still. Strategy mapped unspoken between conspiring eyes.

Steadying. All energy focused – directed at ….

Stand down. Stand down. Rear guard interception!

“Hey, you two leave that rat alone.”

“It’s a mouse.”

“It’s a small cornered terrified rat. Let it go back to the field.”

“We’re naturalists. Like at the Galapagos Islands. Scientific research.”

Boring limitations:Β No mazes. No snapping at bees. June bugs are not to be rolled and left on their backs. No rerouting of earthworms burrowing. No lizards brought into the house.

Four Farm girls with horse. Penfield.1866-1925/LoC/

Adventurous sort collaborating on a mission. (Penfield/LoC/

Leashing of the minds.

Can’t be completely squelched.

Always some little option not formally addressed.

No one ever said anything about squirrels being a protected class.Β 


Phil, the Philosopher Mouse of the Hedge

all rights reserved. Copyrighted. No permissions granted

OK. Here’s the plan. I’ll sit here and you go chase the squirrels down the fence this way. All fair game.Β©













  1. Beth / Mar 23 2015 12:48 pm

    Ahhh… Spring is in the air and furry light snacks are scampering about! Oh delicious Spring!


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 23 2015 2:08 pm

      Well, if people can chomp down at the food truck parties on weekends, the dogs are bound to expect something…maybe the misguided crawfish with the poor judgement to surface in the yard…Thanks for digging up a comment to set on this table.


  2. Kate Crimmins / Mar 23 2015 12:57 pm

    Being bad is always more fun when you have a buddy!


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 23 2015 2:10 pm

      Most boring spring break ever with all the rain. Tired of rearranging furniture indoors, they decided to find amusement outdoors – even if it meant an undercarriage dog wash afterwards. Thanks for romping along

      Liked by 1 person

      • Kate Crimmins / Mar 23 2015 2:15 pm

        With those two big dogs, you need a outdoor carwash to make it easy!


        • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 23 2015 2:22 pm

          That would be pretty cooling for summer, too….wonder what all Home Depot/Lowe’s has in terms of plastic pipes and connectors..thanks for washing up that idea

          Liked by 1 person

  3. easyweimaraner / Mar 23 2015 1:00 pm

    can I join the squirrel chasing team please? they always cheat and climb on trees :o)


    • RAB / Mar 23 2015 1:10 pm

      I have known dogs who can get pretty far up a tree trunk if a squirrel is above….


      • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 23 2015 2:18 pm

        Who knew squirrels would circle up palm trees, sit on the fronds, and fly from palm to palm? Maybe they heard the circus has an opening for an animal act since the elephants are retiring. I think every living thing was outdoor stretching on Sunday after almost 4 inches of rain the day before (which immediately flows into lake and bay here…still a shame we can capture some of that big time and ship to CA right now…I think the Romans had a system…and if they can ship crude in pipelines, why not water?) Thanks for leaping across to leave a comment


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 23 2015 2:14 pm

      Easy, Molly and the German are saving a spot on the team for you! (Bring galoshes or Wellies). Thanks for running along


  4. susielindau / Mar 23 2015 1:34 pm

    Mine have been absent for a few weeks and it’s been nice and quiet!


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 23 2015 2:20 pm

      What no muddy paws? Sounds like a dream.(And more time for twitter!) Saw the first bluebonnet – your spring flowers should be waking up. Thanks for hiking over this way


  5. Paul / Mar 23 2015 3:03 pm

    Ha! Those dastardly squirrels. We had a slew of them and two cats. It was too funny to watch as the cats would be asleep under the hedge in the heat and the squirrels would dance by in front of them, knowing they were there and deliberately taunting them. The cats knew they couldn’t catch the squirrels and would just open one eye for a minute to watch the dance in front of them, and then go back to sleep. Every now and then when the squirrels got too brave and arrogant and turned their backs, the cats would start the chase, catching the squirrels by surprise. The squirrels would still get away and the cats would break off the chase and walk nonchalantly in the opposite direction as if to say “I wasn’t trying to catch you, just scare you.” Ha!

    Oh, hey Phil, you’re not the first to think about a kid/dog wash. There are a number of models on the market, including this one. a aproject at Lowe’s. I’ve seen them on TV before. There are some even fancier than the one pictured here – complete with the rest of the building (in plastic). I’m sure that Molly and the German could easily use these as well.


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 24 2015 9:27 pm

      Ah the classic cat-squirrel tango. How funny the squirrels had all the steps down.
      RC Cat is eager to try. Before being corralled in doors (like a child Dalai Lama in training, she says shyly), she was the tiny kitten being chased by squirrelly monsters (She insists they were not your ordinary power line squirrels but giants…probably space aliens. And She would have driven them from the area, if she had had the time and staff not interfered).
      That Lowe’s has everything! Anyone can have a backyard pool, but a dog wash? Now that would be the hit of the neighborhood.Putting right on the project list. (Might be a really good idea. Right now Molly thinks any time the shower door opens, she’s supposed to hop inside. She knows she often gets to ride in the car after a shower. We worry she’ll learn where the car keys are.)
      Thanks for washing up a great comment to leave. (Summer here today. Hope there’s some sun there, too)


  6. Littlesundog / Mar 23 2015 4:42 pm

    I have a feeling it’s going to be a banner year for squirrels…


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 24 2015 9:30 pm

      I hope the new crop of squirrels wise up quickly. Far too many dancing in the street and the high school kids learning to drive. Thanks for being nutty enough to leave a comment

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Seumas Gallacher / Mar 23 2015 5:43 pm

    …oh look… is that a squirrel?…


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 24 2015 9:38 pm

      Oh, you saw that squirrel hussy. I swear she’s luring the youngsters into the road knowing they are too smitten with her to see the teen driven vehicle approaching. Is she a black widow serial killer locating their stash of nuts then doing them in? They macho squirrelly guys just won’t stop, look, and listen to reason. Watch out – you’re almost over the curb, too. Don’t listen to her chattery siren’s song! Thanks for gathering a comment to add


  8. aFrankAngle / Mar 24 2015 1:19 am

    I think they would enjoy this in the backyard. πŸ™‚


  9. EllaDee / Mar 24 2015 3:44 am

    Molly – Q: How do you catch a squirrel?
    The German – Chase it along the fence…
    Molly – A: Climb up a tree and act like a nut πŸ™‚


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 24 2015 9:44 pm

      (Insert assorted giggles here) Molly can spot/smell them. The German with her antennae ears locates them Between the two, squirrels need to hustle. The German is pretty tall on her back legs and she’s got quite an Olympic style leap. Molly sits very still and pretends to be invisible. She believes it, so why shouldn’t a squirrel? Always a nuttery around here. Thanks for adding some laughs


  10. Kourtney Heintz / Mar 24 2015 4:39 pm

    LOL. Now that’s teamwork. πŸ™‚


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 24 2015 9:47 pm

      And RC is getting nervous with staff getting close to being outnumbered. More squirrels – keep them busy! Thanks for leaping over to chatter along


  11. marthaschaefer / Mar 24 2015 4:56 pm

    When my daughter was young, she dubbed squirrels “Who Who’s” and it stuck. Never had many in my yard and woods until this spring. Bumper crop for some reason. Drives Alice right out of her wrinkly skin!!


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 24 2015 9:52 pm

      There is bumper crop…or word has spread in the woods about easy chow. Certainly keep the dogs busy. Molly will sit and out wait a squirrel until it make desperate leaps from palm frond to palm frond to fence highway. Smiling dog watching in amusement. Paws up for squirrels, Alice!(Molly wants to know if Alice has tried laying down and pretending to be a harmless rock to coax the squirrels within range?)

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Sun / Mar 25 2015 4:14 am

    never mind the squirrel business. i just want to run up and hug that cute Molly!!!!!!!!!!! πŸ˜€


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 25 2015 2:41 pm

      Miss Muddy Paws says to tell you and Chuckie to come on over….well, maybe after her nap. She’s catching up on sleep now that her buddy has gone home. Thanks for romping along

      Liked by 1 person

  13. reneejohnsonwrites / Mar 25 2015 10:38 am

    My GS can’t stand to see any critter invading her yard. So, I’m guessing that isn’t a real flamingo in the picture. LOL. I love that pop of color though.


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 25 2015 2:45 pm

      We once had a dog that wouldn’t even let airplanes fly over the yard. Not in her air space! The German is used to emergency helicopters taking off and landing nearby, so she doesn’t blink – although she prefers to happily enjoy birds singing. Molly is too busy hunting lizards to notice. So far Molly has left the flamingo alone…may be a matter of time, though…(Quick, get some more distracting squirrels over here) Thanks for barking along!

      Liked by 1 person

      • reneejohnsonwrites / Mar 25 2015 11:36 pm

        Squirrels make Gretel nuts too! As do deer, fox, groundhogs…territorial aren’t they!


        • philosophermouseofthehedge / Mar 26 2015 1:44 am

          Maybe it’s their exercise program? After a whole afternoon of guarding the yard, naps seem to be in order around here.

          Liked by 1 person

  14. heretherebespiders / Apr 1 2015 8:49 pm

    Squirrels are evil! Glad you have defenders.


    • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 1 2015 11:51 pm

      Some people must feed them around here. I hate it we are walking and some little squirrel sees me and runs towards us with happy face and bright eyes expecting food. Noooo! Molly is not your friend and watch out for that car! At least the Bluejays keep them under control in spring and summer. No one messes with Bluejays! Thanks for collecting a nutty comment to leave


      • heretherebespiders / Apr 2 2015 7:20 pm

        Wow, jays… Your area is quite similar to where I grew up! I can still hear their raucous cries!


        • philosophermouseofthehedge / Apr 2 2015 10:56 pm

          The air waves are pretty loud with spring bird sounds early morning – nothing says summer more.


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