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May 9, 2012 / philosophermouseofthehedge

Mocking turtles. Shuttling.

Confession.

Been mocking turtles.

No, not rocking them with stones or minerals. That would be cruel.

It’s the bunnies’ fault.

Instead of appearing at dusk in the grassy spot, the bunny couple haven’t poked their heads out of their burrow.

It’s the illegal fishermen’s fault.

They climb the fence and sit on the edge of the island’s bunny feeding spot.

So it’s come to this: hanging out on the bridge watching turtles bob and submerge along the small channel that’s slowly filling up with dirt and weeds.

It’s the developer’s fault.

He wanted a picturesque bridge to his island development: a grand profitable vision. (Too bad he didn’t build a real bridge to maintain current and water flow. The small culverts intended for water flow have filled with silt).

All the deer have left the island: followed the red brick bridge road.

It’s the builders’ fault.

They had to clear all the brush, chop down most of the trees, and level the lots so buyers could see what they could buy. (But no one came.)

It’s the island’s fault.

Really just a mound created by dirt dredged to create the marina. An island in appearance, but shockingly unable provide a firm foundation for a fancy highrise complex as designed.

Too unstable: the dirt foundation – not the builder. (Although the news probably did cause distress.)

So the smug island plans for the next assault.

The decorative lighthouse, a willing conspirator. Mocking.

The lights are on, but nobody’s home!

Score one for nature.

An eddy back to the turtles.

The styrofoam cups, and plastic 6 pack rings – definitely not turtle friendly – are a hazard. (Must get a net to scoop that out.)

 I’m giving the turtles a heads-up: getting them ready.

Soon they will be craning their necks and bobbing around a new arrival on the water:

Quite a bird. A wing spread of 78 feet.

It will look sort of like this (except on a barge instead of a truck as it floats down Clear Lake.)

Mock shuttle leaving Kennedy Space Center, Florida
(Image: Robert Pearlman/www.collectspace.com)

Heading to Johnson Space Center is a full-scale replica of a space shuttle. With good weather and tail winds, the mock shuttle will arrive by June 1.

This tourist exhibit shuttle was called “Explorer” in Florida – great name choice as tourists got to explore the interior payload bay and crew cabin. But that was Florida.

It will be renamed. Something more appropriate.

There’s going to be a contest.

(Will that cause an identity crisis?)

Today, just warning the turtles to duck.

The turtles seem amused.

They mocked with an observation:

“It may look like a duck. It may float like a duck. But if it doesn’t fly, it’s not a duck.

A quacky thought to ponder.

Another wacky riddle: while NASA was scrambling for leftovers space artifacts, why didn’t they bid on Neil Armstrong’s 1967 blue  Chevrolet Corvette that was auctioned off on eBay?

As the news reports said, “it didn’t go to the moon, but it sure looks like it did.”

WOW. Now that would have drawn some tourists.

Cadillac Ranch. (Richie Diesterheft:WIKI)

Cadillac Ranch. Amarillo, TX
(Image: Richie Diesterheft / WIKI)

Maybe they could do a Cadillac Ranch thing with other astronauts’ Corvettes on the JSC grounds. Art always draws a crowd.

The others Corvettes aren’t available? So? When has that been a deterrent? Just find some reasonable facsimiles. Obviously it doesn’t have to be the real thing. It’s just an exhibit after all.

That “boldly go where no one has gone” and “one giant step for mankind” era is over.

It’s our own fault.

I’ll leave you with something to do besides mocking turtles:

“Mock Space Shuttle Moved to Make Way for the Real Thing” - A Photo Gallery. Seriously amazing pictures of a flightless bird traveling by truck from Florida’s Kennedy Space Center.

 McDonald’s seems to be  embracing the theme with their MockAstronaut!

Time’s a wastin’

Phil, the Philosopher Mouse of the Hedge

Related post: “Gosh darn! Ya git ta name it!” (Name suggestions for the replica shuttle)

These titles are just so inspiring:

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27 Comments

  1. Jim Cantwell / May 9 2012 3:17 pm

    one giant step for mankind would be fixing our planet or better said what humans have done to it

    Like

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 9 2012 3:24 pm

      And now they are blaming dinosaur digestive gases for global warming: all those giant methane burps and farts. Humans are just so creative, right? Thanks for floating by

      Like

  2. ceciliag / May 9 2012 3:19 pm

    Hilarious.. bridges of wild thought! . good morning c

    Like

  3. The Hook / May 9 2012 3:27 pm

    Your work is incredibly creative and original. Do yuo realize how rare a talent like yours is these days?
    Seriously, there are thousands, hundreds of thousands of bloggers, in fact, writing about the same things – their sex lives, politics. etc., but your voice and style are unique.
    Good, no, GREAT, for you!

    Like

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 9 2012 5:45 pm

      As you are well aware, the world is full of interesting characters and events. Glad you are along for the ride. Not everyone gets it. Appreciate your willingness to participate in the wacky. Thanks

      Like

  4. shoreacres / May 9 2012 5:52 pm

    Oh, those wacky developers and builders. It’s always something….

    It’s rare that I get stopped cold and sit here thinking, “WHA….?????” But look at this, from the first article you linked to about the mock shuttle:

    ““It’s at least two months away and possibly longer because of working the linguistics of getting it here,” Space Center Houston President Richard Allen said.”

    I finally figured out what the word is supposed to be, but not until I had a good laugh about the linguistics of shuttle-moving!

    Like

  5. sportsattitudes / May 9 2012 5:58 pm

    That last photo got me to pondering life beyond Earth. There probably is a McDonald’s on each planet. The “Golden Arches” are everywhere…

    Like

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 9 2012 6:18 pm

      It must be a plot.
      That McDonald’s flyman is holding out some golden fries – wonder if that will be switched out to a nice fresh salad?
      Thanks for orbiting by!

      Like

  6. writingfeemail / May 9 2012 10:29 pm

    How inconvenient that Mother Nature didn’t cooperate. If she had, how long do you suppose it would be before a hurricane leveled the houses? BTW – gave you an award today. Enjoy.

    Like

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 9 2012 11:10 pm

      Mother Nature is watching out! Actually this area is relatively high ground – and the island is even more elevated. The last hurricane went directly over, but the streets never had water over the curb (according to neighbors who stayed) and it drained off immediately into the lake and out into the bay when the rain stops. We worried about storm surge pushing water up into the lake, more than wind. The small deer herd weathered the storm in the brush on the island fine.(people always put out feed and fresh water for them. We are sad they left by the greenbelt to the fields and parklands nearby.)
      I’m honored being selected to receive your award.Will pop over shortly (and I will get it all done…eventually!) Thanks for floating over to chat.

      Like

  7. PiedType / May 10 2012 2:28 am

    It’s named Explorer but they’re going to rename it? Isn’t that sort of irreverent or something?

    Like

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 10 2012 2:33 am

      Odd isn’t it. Isn’t there something about changing the name of a ship being bad luck? (maybe it’s OK since it’s just a mock space ship…) Thanks for rocketing by

      Like

  8. jannatwrites / May 10 2012 6:41 am

    I don’t really understand the point of a full-size replica. It obviously wasn’t used on any missions, so wouldn’t a scale model suffice? Granted it’s late, but I don’t think I’ll get it in the morning either :)

    Like

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 10 2012 2:53 pm

      Good question – Florida is know for amazing tourist attractions…this was one built for the Florida space center using NASA blueprints, and real shuttle specs by a company that specializes in authentic replicas…it even used some real shuttle parts. It’s gotta go to make room for a real shuttle coming to the Florida’s Kennedy Space Center’s visitors center. (Now it’s even more confusing…)Thanks for puzzling along

      Like

  9. CATachresis / May 10 2012 8:55 am

    Phil, your linguistic acrobatics leave me speechless but admiring! My neurons are fizzing!!! Have to say that I’m not one of those who mock turtles that duck. … It’s just not cricket ;)

    Like

  10. EllaDee / May 10 2012 11:19 am

    Ah, humans keep kidding themselves they can do it better that nature. Ask the turtles & the bunnies how smart is that?

    Like

  11. roughseasinthemed / May 10 2012 1:53 pm

    What EllaDee said in a way. Not a fan of changing watercourses here, or inappropriate developments. Water always finds its own way. But will we learn?

    Like

    • philosophermouseofthehedge / May 10 2012 3:10 pm

      It would have been so easy to build a real bridge instead of one just for appearance – More peninsula than island now. So far no building – and the island is re-dressing itself in trees and brush. Thanks for wading in.

      Like

  12. Jeannie / May 10 2012 3:29 pm

    We’ve educated the common sense right out…who’s mocking who? It’s not my fault!

    Like

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